A River Runs Through It

Photos!

Laura's wedding:

Priest Lake, ID:
John and I at Hempfest in Moscow, ID:
Spokane during Bloomsday:

I just relived "A River Runs Through It" this weekend. 

I spent Labor Day weekend fly-fishing with John and his dad at their families cabin, circa 1930s. What John didn't tell me in all the many times that he told me how great the cabin is and how its one of his favorite places, is that all of the women in the family refused to spend the night at the cabin.

(Which is fair: there was no running water/electricity, but there was a mouse)

But really, it was pretty fun. Nice to get away, enjoy the sun, see the mountains. And I even caught my first fish! First fly-fished fish anyway. 

Here is a pic of Missoula, not mine though, I just stole this one:

I get internet in one corner of my kitchen, sometimes.

I am in Montana now. 

It's crazy that about a year ago I was writing about moving to Spokane, and now I am picking it up and doing it all over again. This time, the desert of eastern Oregon was less of a shock when we passed through it on our Greyhound bound way to Spokane, and then to Missoula.  But for the most part, I'm doing it all again, but it's a whole different world.

For instance, our house was lovingly but not quite sufficiently furnished. I chopped vegetables for our first dinner with a butter knife. So we've had to trust in the goodness of the community to slowly begin to stock our kitchen. But let me tell you, once word got out that we were having trouble opening a bank account and were running low on cash, three people dropped us off dinner and groceries in one afternoon. Montanans are definitely what you would call "friendly." Our next door neighbor dropped us off a gallon of milk and sincerely apologized, repeatedly, for our financial situation, saying, "this just doesn't happen in this town." 

(Basically our agencies were confused about how/when/what to pay us and had put off figuring that out till we arrived. So that, coupled with our area director being on vacation, and a change in the rent, and trouble opening a bank account, we were getting kind of worried. Worried being a relative term seeing as how obviously we aren't going to starve in this kind of community, and of course JVC would help us out. It's all set now, but I know this house has been a headache for headquarters!) 

As for the job - working with men and women experiencing homelessness is a far cry from working with kids. Here's a few vignettes: 

One man came in with hands swollen, bloody, pussy and cracking. He said he had been to the Emergency Room and they told him he had an allergic reaction to soap, which was probably not helped out by caffeine, smoking, and stress. (He forgot the name of the condition and couldn't reach into his pocket to find the paper the doctor had written it down on.) He spent the morning trying to find a clinic that would fill a pain prescription because most of the ones that assist low-income people in the area refuse to fill painkillers. He had been out of work for a month because he had broken his collarbone, and that day he was supposed to start work as a dishwasher, which, of course, he had to decline.

Another man, who is about 50 but looks to be about 75, wheres a oversized black Diamond Rio shirt every day, along with a cowboy hat decorated in charms and tinsel. It looks like something an 8 year old girl would have decorated for a birthday party. He came in with a knee brace and a wrist brace and crutches, complete with cuts and bruises on his face, after he had been beaten while sleeping near the railroad tracks. He is off to a medical rehab facility, and told me he doesn't mind sleeping outside, but could probably use the time off from drinking. Yesterday, he found a purse on the sidewalk, clean and empty, and brought it in to see if I'd want it. 

For the most part, our days are pretty quiet. Someone will come stumbling in drunk occasionally and make a scene. But usually the clients watch movies, sleep off the night, or use the computer and I read the paper and shoot the breeze with people. I'm the only female direct service staff there, and its pretty funny to listen to them apologize for every four-letter word that comes out of their mouth. I'm currently in the process of nipping all nicknames (e.g. sweetheart, little girl, beautiful) in the bud and insisting on being called "Jackie" or nothing at all. One of the clients wants to call me Jackie the Jesuit, and I said that's okay. 

Breaking up is hard to do...

No, not John and I, don't worry.

I think breaking up is the best way to describe how I feel about leaving my housemates, Spokane, St. Anne's. It's been good, its time to go, and it hurts like hell. These are the most real relationships I've ever had in my life. Ones where we fight, make up, realize we'll never get along perfectly but cant still hang out, cry, play football in the park, and love unconditionally. And there have been a lot of conditions this year. "Could people please not put onions in things they cook?" "Could we clean the bathroom more often?" "Could people not leave their socks on the floor?" "Could people start interrupting people?" So many requests that you could bang your head against a wall. 

But on the other hand, they will always be my community.  Good, bad, thick, thin, yada yada yada. 

I feel absolutely nauseous about leaving. I'm ready to go, however. And John and I will be going to Missoula, so that's awesome. And Brian and Jon are visiting in September, so the good byes really aren't too drastic. And Alyssa will be living 3 hrs away in Spokane still.  So I'll survive. But still, these are the only people who really can understand what this year has been like. I remember talking to a JV up in Omak and she said when her year ended back in June that it was a harder tranisition than leaving college, and now I get why. (Even though I'm not really an FJV, former JV, yet). You're leaving this super intense year, where being a JV has been your identity, and leaving people who know you and know every up and down you've had this year, and then you're catapulted back into another world. College, other people have been through, but this...this was something else. 

But I'll be in Montana in 9 days. To start all over... And now I must go clean my house, which will surely squash any sentimental feelings I have about it.

On being a JV

So the end of the year has posed much time for reflection and conversation over the past 12 months. Especially since I'm bound for another year of $80 a month, I've been thinking a lot about what has it meant to live simply. So here are a few thoughts.

* Living simply has nothing to do with living in solidarity with the poor. Being poor is not simply financial poverty, but a poverty of resources. I have family, education, etc. I will likely never be "poor." The "poor" would also think you are ridiculous living in solidarity with them, because they don't want to be poor.

* I can never really complain about money. For one, I chose to make $80. If you include my community stipend, it's a little less than $400 a month for all my living expenses. And there has hardly been a time that I've really lacked anything. Your money goes where you chose to spend it.
Granted, my money goes to the bars a good bit, which is why I've been sharing contact solution the last month and John brought me home a tube of toothpaste from the homeless shelter. (Sorry to let you know the truth, Mom and Dad.) Really, I'm just waiting on my bonus ($250!) at the end of the year to restock necessities. I just don't want to spend my last two weeks in Spokane sitting around. Especially not while Harry Potter is in town.

* I've forgotten what luxuries really are. It's a luxury to go out for coffee, not a necessity to 'meet up with someone.' Going out to dinner, or to a movie is a luxury. And when you do it once a month instead of once a week, it tastes a lot better.

* I haven't missed what I can't afford, because I have 7 housemates. I don't run to Starbucks on the way to work, I make a pot of coffee every morning for whomever wants it. We don't go shopping, we try on each others clothes. We hardly go to the movies where you have to sit in silence in a room full of people, we rent movies and play "chick-flick bingo." (10 points for shopping with the best friend, 15 points for the break-up-you-know-won't-last, etc). Friends are free, and having friends who are poor makes hanging out cheap.

* People are usually more generous to JVs than to people who are actually poor. I don't know why. I think more than a few people spent the $40 we got for Christmas on beer.

* I have very few needs, and many wants.

* Bike commuting is great, but when you don't have a back-up such as a car, waking up to a flat tire is not enjoyable. Also, bike commuters can be snobby. Once, Kelly and I went to a Bike-to-Work week pancake breakfast, in our work clothes like we normally do. Everyone else there was wearing their spandex and jerseys. We felt really out of place, especially since we probably bike to work on average way more than everyone else there! (December, January, and February were the only months I didn't bike to work at all.) Heck, I even biked in two inches of snow mid-April.

* Churches that have free donuts after mass is where JVs will end up going.

It's official...

I'm crazy. I signed up for a second year of JVC.

This has been a terribly long process, starting back in FEBRUARY and just finding out on FRIDAY! So I've had plenty of time to discern/process/change my mind, and I'm still going ahead with it, so I must be crazy. The reason it took so long is that the agency I wanted to work for just got the funding to come through for a JV a few weeks ago.

So come August I'm off to Missoula, Montana to work at the Salcido center. (www.thepoverellocenter.org). It's a drop in center for people who cannot use the regular homeless shelter due to being under the influence. They also provide services that are less case-management and housing based than the main shelter's service. Like GED classes or exercise.

So I'm going to go from working with cute babies and changing diapers to drunk yoga.

I'm excited, St. Anne's has had its ups and downs, but I am definitely ready for something different.

The chillins are waking up from nap...time to go.

So its been a million years.

So I almost forgot I even had a blog. Life has been crazy at work. Catholic Charities, the umbrella organization all of the JVs in Spokane work for, has been in a huge financial crisis. Which has made life rough of many of us. I'm working a lot of overtime now (which yes, everyone does. But I don't get paid...so I have to take care of myself in other ways, such as making sure I get a lunch break!). The homeless shelter is laying off people, we're on a hiring freeze, etc... Our projects, such as the garden and the literacy program, have had to be put on hold so I can cover more time in the classrooms. Which is not fun; as much as I love kids, 8 hours a day with 8 or more of them is enough for me!

In other news, spring is beautiful in Spokane. May was a month of Sundays for me in some ways. Mid may, the family came to visit and we did the grand Washington tour. They saw dry, dry, dry, eastern Washington in the wet season. And Seattle in its wetter season. It was much fun and a good vacation.

The next weekend was Memorial day weekend so the center was closed. We went on a 15 mile hike at Upper Priest Lake in Idaho. Idaho, as it turns out, is a very beautiful state with less potatoes than you would think. We were just going to go on a 10 mile hike, but the road to that was snowed out. (Yes, snow. It will never end). Then a 6 mile hike turned in to a 12 mile hike, then a couple of back tracks turned it into a 15 mile hike. (in my new chacos!)

For memorial day we went on a 25 mile bike ride which was a lot of fun. Spokane is pretty nice in the spring. It's finally staying in the 70s here.

The next weekend, we had our retreat in McCall, Idaho. Usually JVC retreats are a bit of hippy-dippy nonsense to say the least. (I'm all for the hippy dippy, but our Social Justice retreate included a lady talking about how she spent the last 5 years in a cabin by herself on a mountain. Then she broke out her auroa rods). But this one was led be a former Jesuit (so enough against the norm to satisfy JVC) and mainly included canoeing, sitting on the porch, frisbee and a lot of reflection time.

The funny thing about the retreat was that for the JVs teaching on reservations, their year is over. And I have two more months left. (Here anyway). So lots of good byes, and then coming back to work.

So back to work...

Bikes and basketball

So I won the NCAA Tournament Bracket pool we did. $55. Not too shabby, eh? GO TARHEELS!

And with my winnings I bought a bike!

A $25 beater. Actually, it's not that bad. It needs new tires, tape on the handlebars, some oil and a little love but its in pretty good shape. It's a women's Schwinn World. Probably at least 15 years old. So I'm planning on spending the weekend fixing up the bike, because luckily (and suddenly) the weather has turned...

into Spring! So maybe we got a couple of inches of snow last week. I must thank Spokane for giving me a true taste of an Inland Northwest winter. I would've hated to spend a year on the other side of the country and miss the snowiest winter on record. There is still a pile of snow in our playground.

I'm turning into a Spokanite. In winter, Spokanites complain about the winter and in spring, summer, and fall they talk about about bad the winter was. So moving on...spring so far seems lovely. Time to start planting our preschool garden! More on that when we've gotten in started.

Jackie

Do something to change the world: Enjoy spring and take a bike ride!