Breaking up is hard to do...

No, not John and I, don't worry.

I think breaking up is the best way to describe how I feel about leaving my housemates, Spokane, St. Anne's. It's been good, its time to go, and it hurts like hell. These are the most real relationships I've ever had in my life. Ones where we fight, make up, realize we'll never get along perfectly but cant still hang out, cry, play football in the park, and love unconditionally. And there have been a lot of conditions this year. "Could people please not put onions in things they cook?" "Could we clean the bathroom more often?" "Could people not leave their socks on the floor?" "Could people start interrupting people?" So many requests that you could bang your head against a wall. 

But on the other hand, they will always be my community.  Good, bad, thick, thin, yada yada yada. 

I feel absolutely nauseous about leaving. I'm ready to go, however. And John and I will be going to Missoula, so that's awesome. And Brian and Jon are visiting in September, so the good byes really aren't too drastic. And Alyssa will be living 3 hrs away in Spokane still.  So I'll survive. But still, these are the only people who really can understand what this year has been like. I remember talking to a JV up in Omak and she said when her year ended back in June that it was a harder tranisition than leaving college, and now I get why. (Even though I'm not really an FJV, former JV, yet). You're leaving this super intense year, where being a JV has been your identity, and leaving people who know you and know every up and down you've had this year, and then you're catapulted back into another world. College, other people have been through, but this...this was something else. 

But I'll be in Montana in 9 days. To start all over... And now I must go clean my house, which will surely squash any sentimental feelings I have about it.